Flashbacks and memories

One of the downsides to being a borderline is flashbacks and such. It is a horrid experiance, its like watching a video of myself being abused, a bit like being an outsider. Anything can bring them on, sound, smell, familar surroundings and memories. Last night in the bath I realised it has been months since I had a flashback. I think this is partly because I have once again shut the past away, because I havn't dealt with it properly I expect intime it will rear its ugly head again.. usually happens. Also my meds are so much more settled now its great, I seem to be having fewer and fewer bad days atm, and the last time I self harmed was a week ago and only did one small cut before I stopped. I also seem to be in much more control of myself. But I think a lot of that is due to the forced shutting it away!!

Diverting a little bit... went to college today, I was too scared to go in for todays pracical lesson but I did attend the theory class and it was very productive.....